Week 7 Update

Hello gentlemen.....week 7 is in the books and something very special occurred this week. Sound the trumpets!!!! The Airborne Thugs have stopped the bleeding and brought home victory #1 on the year!!!! Not only did Bob's band of misfits and retreads win, they posted almost enough to be the "Big John" Stud of the Week, falling just 3 points short of the 196 tallied by Team Trauma. Congrats to Bob on his first (and possibly only) win of the season.....anyone remember when Wes was tied for 1st place???? It feels like so long ago that I believe Birkenstocks with wooly socks were cool......and, no Styx, they aren't still cool.

On the NFL front, the hapless Bears dropped their third straight game as Jay Cutler completed pass after pass with laser-like precision.........to DeAngelo Hall!!!! Really Jay, was it gonna take 9 picks before you stopped throwing in that guy's direction???? I'm not sure of it, but I think he had a pretty good read on your delivery. If it was me, I probably would've quit passing his way after the one-handed interception that he returned 90 yards to the house.......but that's just me! During the bye-week Cutler is going to be lobbying the state senate in Illinios to insitute a new lottery game called the "Weekly Pick 6". The only people NOT eligible to participate in the new game are the Bears WRs.....everyone else is good to go. If you can lace up a pair of cleats, you have a damn good shot at winning each week!

Alright, let's get to this week's action in this league. Here's how things looked from where I sat.
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"Big John" Stud of the Week

Our stud this week comes all the way from Danville, Indiana just outside of Indianapolis as Team Trauma blew up for 196 points....much to the dismay of Nooner's Panthers. How do you score that high when you have a WR that records a zero? Well, it's possible when the rest of your team is in double digits and half of them put up over 20 points. Oh, yeah, he also had the Washington defense.......or should we call them the Washington offense????

Two of Andy's lesser players came to perform on Sunday as Matt Moore and Brandon Jackson doubled their projections and then some. Who do you think was more confused on Sunday? Nooner after getting the near 200 point bomb dropped on him with enormous games from Moore and Jackson, or this guy..................



I'm going with Noon!!!!
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Turd of the Week

The turd this week is brought to us by Jason Kos and "The Knuckle". Kos had his worst week to date as only Aaron Rodgers, Frank Gore, and his kicker were able to scrape up totals in the double-digits as 8 of his guys failed to clear 9 points. Ryan Matthews continued his season long siesta and Tony Romo collapsed in a cartoon-like heap after breaking his collarbone midway through the game on Monday. Sunto rolled to an easy victory as his team blasted Kos' with a 70 point casualty. Better contact Sean for a QB trade, Kos.....he's got Troy Smith, you know.

I'm not sure what is more pathetic.....Kos' score in this matchup, the old guy that can't seem to rip himself away from the strip clubs, or the old guy that can't rip himself away from the dance floor filled with college kids.




Kos.....you gotta spend more time at home, my man!
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"The Situation" of the Week

OK, Styx, I know you were able to roll through last season (and even win the playoffs) with a one QB lineup......but what is this latest strategy that you are trying to employ???? A zero QB lineup???? I mean, you did still outscore Kos, but are you really going to go the rest of the year with Mark Sanchez and VY as your QBs and then plug in Charlie Whitehurst (check out his sweeeeet Lion-O look!) when one of them is injured or on a bye???? Brian Wilson's beard thinks this plan is a bad idea! Make a move, man!!!! Your team doing anything this season seems to have about as good of a chance of succeeding as these guys have of graduating..........




All of you should all probably call it a year!
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Well, that's it for this week boys. The Commish will be back next week with all new hi-jinx and hilarities. Keep plugging away at making your teams the best that they can possibly be as EVERYONE (yes, even Bob) still has a shot at making the playoffs. I'm outta here like the bandit that was printing these IDs.........do you think this is a fake or is Mississippi just reallllllllllyyyy liberal with their license photos????